11.05.10
NSA-Pittsburgh’s Next Exciting Event!
We’d love to see you at our NSA-Pittsburgh meeting this month. You’ll get inspired to take your business to the next sphere. Here’s what to expect—
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10.18.10
What Aura are YOU Creating?
I was checking into my hotel this weekend and the clerk at the desk suddenly asked me, “You O.K.?” I looked up at him because I had not idea what he was talking about. “You seem a little stressed.”
That was surprising. I had no idea! I guess my big sigh gave it away. After I finally found the hotel, and registered, I was glad be done with this busy day and the business of thinking about the next day’s meetings.
But was my relief THAT loud? Really?
That made me wonder what other vibes we are giving off that we are completely unaware of.
The impressions we’re creating in people.
The worries we are giving people.
The time away from productivity that we are robbing people.
And we don’t even KNOW it!!
If I had been more AWARE, I could have created an aura around myself that wouldn’t have signaled stress. I could have developed a ring of inspire that would have radiated out in a lighter way than sighing and phew-ing.
It really IS that subtle, and it really IS that important. The aura we create does rifle through the lives and actions of others. That’s why it’s vital to create a HUMOR environment, one that will elicit a fluidity that doesn’t derail people. One that makes it easy to focus on the goal ahead. And one that makes it pleasant and fun to be involved in.
That’s the aura I want to be creating {sigh}.
What’s YOUR aura look like? How funny is THAT?
10.08.10
Why there’s no “E” in TEAM
- Image via Wikipedia
Why isn’t there much energy in YOUR team?
Maybe it’s because the small misunderstandings, poor communication, and cloudy goals are taking their toll.
The focus shifts from the target. And onto the tangible inconsistencies, tactile disagreements, and tarnished relationships.
How do we fix this fiasco?
We inject a dose of HUMOR.
Not to cover up the bad feelings, but to UNcover them and get to a point of truth and honesty—>clarity
Not to attack others by making fun of them, but by laughing at our own mistakes—>authenticity
Not to get laughs, but to create an environment where people feel free to offer their ideas—>safety
How can YOU improve the “E” in your team? share your ideas here!
www.yourshiningexample.com
What Business Can Learn From the Amish
- Image via Wikipedia
Yesterday I went looking for some mums for my mom. I decided to stop in at one of the many Amish home-grown stores that dot the countryside where I live. This particular store was a new place for me, and I had to ask where the store actually was.
“It’s there in the basement,” the woman of the house called down to me from behind some laundry hanging on the second story porch.
So I guiltily went into their house. Not feeling wholly like a consumer but rather like an intruder. I had to sheepishly walk past the family’s Amish teen as he sat impatiently on the buggy outside the door. He must’ve been telling his dad or grandpa to hurry up, yelling things low German, something about “Jawohl” and “wunderbar.” Even with my degree in German, I was no expert here. This was clearly their territory, where they felt comfortable enough to allow strangers to shop.
“This is craziness!” I thought to myself. “Anyone could walk into their house, take anything, leave, and they’d never know any different!” Their cash register was an empty baby-wipes container, with a notebook beside, where we were to write down what we bought, along with the price.
I searched through the mini gourds and pumpkins and the small acorn squash, and baskets of patatoes as the house inhabitants talked loudly on the floor overhead.
“What a strange way to do business,” I thought.
But then I wondered, “Why don’t we always do business this way?”
—Letting people know our “real’ selves, yelling and all.
—Not putting on a facade of “businesslike” perfection.
—Feeling free to speak our own language, whether customers are present or not.
The days of doing business the ‘old skool way’ are over, I’m afraid. This casualness is what’s “in”. Take it from an archaic people group like the Amish. Why are they so intriguing? How can they make us want to eat more fruits and vegetables and pay any price we see marked on the “These dill pickles”-type hand-written signs?
Because they offer something that humor offers us. Something DIFFERENT. Very different from our normal business interactions that are characterized by no eye contact, rarely checking our credit card “see i.d.” section, on a good day maybe hearing a “thank you,” and not being invited into the box store’s basement.
With a HUMOR lifestyle, these new business behaviors can flow naturally. We can be
—Open and less self-conscious
—More easily and naturally friendly
—More inviting, less protective
—Better service-providers
See: we can learn from anyone, anything. If we are aware enough to notice!
10.03.10
Are YOU A Ninja Bird?
I’m excited about getting a book in the mail yesterday. It’s by Jennifer Kahnweiler, Ph.D. and it’s for introverts everywhere—or, as my friend Bill likes to call us, “Ninja Birds.” “The Introverted Leader: Building On Your Quiet Strength.”
Before I even opened the book, I wondered to myself what it could tell us about how introverts can use humor, especially in the workplace.
I wondered:
1. How can these Ninja Birds overcome the stress of adjusting (or even more stressful, of not adjusting) to a daily world and culture seemingly ruled by extroverts? HOW CAN THEY LIGHTEN UP?
2. How can these Ninja Birds get over their anxiety about public speaking, making presentations, and offering input in meetings? HOW CAN THEY GAIN AN OUT-WARD FOCUS?
3. How can these Ninja Birds throw off their insecurities and comparision-making? HOW CAN THEY ACCEPT THEIR IMPERFECTIONS AND EVEN LAUGH ABOUT THEM?
All these questions will be answered, I’m sure, by the time I’ve finished reading the book.
But for now, how would YOU, fellow Ninja Bird, answer those questions? And how would YOU, non-Ninja’s help your co-workers, partners, spouses, children, parents, friends, to lighten up?
Share your ideas here, or message me at info@yourshiningexample.com and I’ll post some of the best ideas on my Facebook Fan Page!
Let’s start thinking about how we can help everyone in our workplace to, “Get Your S.H.I.N.E. Together!” so we can ALL, ”Live Life—Lite!”
On Being a Good-Natured Woman in a Man’s World…
Looking over some notes from my hand-out I had for a presentation on women and humor. A great book to read on this subject is Mackoff’s ”What Mona Lisa knew: A woman’s guide to getting ahead in business by lightening up.”
Women have earned the right to be taken seriously! We need to strive for perfection, be aggressive, defend ourselves, and act like a man!! Or do we?…
Perfectionism, you see, puts others on the defensive. They will be waiting and watching for you to slip up. You can’t relax, they can’t relax. You won’t risk trying new ideas, because your image is at stake.
Your sense of humor conveys your authority: your self-composure, your control of the situation, and your eventual climb up the ladder of success. We can respond in a way that is either defensive, aggressive, or mirthful.
Women’s sense of humor differs from men’s style of humor. Women have a sense of humor that reflects shared experiences, is situational, respects personal taboos, and is empathic. Men’s sense of humor is more rational, literal, and aggressive.
Women can use their unique style of humor to highlight the absurdity of a situation and playfully redefine the situation in a non-aggressive manner. This process helps to dissolve discord by avoiding humiliating yourself or others. In this way, you can subdue your attackers by getting into harmony with them. First, mirror the other person’s comment, and then build on it with exaggeration. You are not agreeing with the comment, only reflecting its absurdity.
A workplace that is mirthful will promote an aura of creativity because relationships will improve, making people more relaxed. When people feel relaxed, they are more motivated in these three areas:
Focus: humor reduces learner anxiety, and positive emotions promote listening and retention skills.
Problem-solving: humor releases the tension that keeps us from focusing, and humor promotes the capacity for risk-taking.
Teamwork & Leadership: humor can help you get feedback on others’ personality and working style. Your good humor can be the softest, yet most effective form of persuasion.
How funny were YOU today? What steps can you take to change that tomorrow?
09.18.10
Want to be a better speaker? Want to learn from the best?
Here’s a great opportunity that my mentor, Jeff Tobe, is offering to speakers, presenters, educators, sales people—anyone who wants their speaking to make a greater impact on their productivity, profit, and plain old work-life satisfaction:
“Have you been looking to take your speaking career to the next plateau - or to take the first steps towards that speaking career?
Emerging Speakers Academy will be held over the course of 2 ½ days from September 24-26. This workshop is limited to 15 people to allow for a more “personal touch.” Some of the benefits include:
· 2 ½ days focused on taking your career to the next plateau
· Input from various NSA professionals during the weekend - LIVE!
· 6 month unlimited coaching via email (limited telephone consulting as well)
· You will leave the weekend with a new Mastermind Group with which you will be expected to meet over the ensuing 6 months and to whom you will be accountable
Remember, there is only one week left to register!
Please register online at http://www.jefftobe.com/academy.shtml -
For more info or to talk with Jeff directly, just go here:
Jeff Tobe, CSP
Coloring Outside the Lines
Emerging Speakers Academy
412-373-6592
08.25.10
Seriously? Gen Y’ers aren’t Gen-Whiners?
- Image by Ron Hogan via Flickr
Just read Scott the Nametag Guy’s blog post. He’s giving advice to Gen-Y‘ers on how to be taken seriously by their elders at work.
His first piece of advice? Don’t take yourself too seriously. Sound familiar? Like something I’ve been writing about here since 2007 perhaps?
He adds that if you want people to take you seriously, “don’t just get over yourself – stay over yourself.” That is, don’t focus on being #1, being perfect, being the best, out-doing everyone else.
That mindset fuels perfectionism. And then—people are just waiting for you to fail.
Instead: Let your guard down on yourself. Give yourself a break. Relax, so you can just BE yourself.
But DO take seriously your values. Be consistent with them, focus on them, not on yourself.
Paradoxically, when we lighten up, we become a career heavyweight. Because our success and effectiveness flow more easily, and in the direction of progress.
What are YOU so serious about today?
Y Trust?
- Image via Wikipedia
Just got off the phone with Mike, the director of the YMCA. I told him about the membership I’d won at a Chinese Auction. I hadn’t heard from the event organizers, so I called Mike to see what to do.
He said to just come in and they can do all the paperwork. He didn’t even need to see proof of my win.
He explained, “In this day and age of not trusting, the Y trusts!”
I thought, “How unusual. How inviting. How much fun!” Just by doing, offering, being something that everyone else today avoids. What else do we actively avoid, besides trusting? Hoping for the best? Praying for a good outcome? Giving ourselves the benefit of the doubt, instead of self-doubt?
Humor and it’s corresponding mindset drives us to see these out-of-the-way attitudes and behaviors. Teaches us how to perform them. How to shape our beliefs so that we can create something out-of-the ordinary. Something memorable. Something maybe even—fun!
08.14.10
Happy Happenstance!
- Image by photine via Flickr
Humor isn’t just about making us feel good, or making us laugh. It’s also about helping us through times of transition. And few transitions are as frustrating, costly, or aggravating than career transitions.
There is an actual career theory that incorporates the best of what humor has to offer. That is, being open to new possibilities.
Happenstance Theory uses these tools to help us structure our next career move:
1. exercising curiosity
2. exploring new opportunities
3. taking an optimistic view
4. being proactive (=unafraid) in the face of uncertainty
These qualities were noted by Mitchell, Levin and Krumboltz in their article, “Planned happenstance: Constructing unexpected career opportunities.”
By staying in the humor mindset, we can cultivate happenstance. We can be ready for it, open to the new doors it offers to us. When we “create the context” for change to occur (as Susan Imel describes Happenstance Theory in her article “Surviving the Career Doldrums”), we welcome change rather than avoid it.
